For many men, the idea of asking
a woman out is nothing short of terrifying. It can make even the bravest men
nervous. There is no reason getting a date should be stressful, though.
Here is how to make it happen.
1.
Remember
that women are not from a different planet. Some men approach women like they
are from Venus, while men are from Mars. If you want to improve your dating
game, toss that divisive mentality aside. When you talk to a woman, you are not
talking to the equivalent of an alien. There may be differences between the two
of you, as is the case with any person you talk to you, but there are also
bound to be a number of similarities. Focus on what you share, not what separates
you.
2.
Stop
stressing about rejection. Dating is a process. For most people, finding the
right person takes hundreds, even thousands, of dates. Incompatibilities arise,
life factors force people to take different paths, and feelings change. The
sooner you make peace with the fact things might go differently than you
originally planned, the better your experience with dating is likely to be.
3.
Get
on her radar. Some men are suave and lucky enough to approach a woman out of the
blue and get a date out of it, but most women would be pretty stunned by someone so
forward. If you are interested in a woman who you see fairly regularly, it is
better to get on her radar first. Pay her extra attention, but don't get stuck in a faux-boyfriend role, either. Eventually, check her marital status by asking
a question about her husband or boyfriend. She'll get what you're hinting at.
4.
Learn
her interests. If you have paid more attention to her than others, fished out
her single status, and she still seems warm to you, chances are she is at least
somewhat interested. Now it is time to learn about her interests. You will be
able to use this information when you ask her out. You have to be careful not
to stay in this stage for too long. The longer you act like a platonic friend,
the more likely it is that she will only view you that way.
5.
Just
do it – ask her out. If the woman you are interested in seems to enjoy your
company and is openly available, ask her out. Ask over the phone or, better
still, ask her in person. Avoid text messages and e-mail, since most people
find them to be impersonal. Keep your question short and simple. Suggest that
the two of you do something that you know she would like based on the
conversations you held earlier about her interests. Offer a
specific time and date. If you leave the question open-ended, you will only
have to reinitiate the question sometime in the future.
One of the worst things you can
do in the dating game is to anguish over circumstances that are not in your
control. With dating, you cannot control another person’s feelings. What you
can do, however, is make sure the woman you are attracted to feels comfortable
around you and that she is single. If both those things apply, go for it. Ask
her out.
