3 Pick-Up Lines to Pick Up

It's a scene that makes most women grimace.

A man strolls over to a woman in a crowded bar. He leans his head forward. Smiles. Then he asks, "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

The woman reports no injuries. The man, on the other hand, leaves the exchange with a bruised ego.

Why don't women like these pick-up lines? Why do they shirk from men who produce recycled phrases?

It's because these lines usually come off stiff or, worse case scenario, downright creepy. They're not a good way to pick up women.

There are some things you can say to women that work, though. And they're probably not what you'd expect.

Hi, I'm __________. What's your name?


I know, it seems too easy, doesn't it? No poetry. No allusions to angels. No choirs.

Turns out, the understatement is better than fine. If you're approaching a woman out of the blue, especially in a place like a bar, she can guess your motivations. By keeping the introduction simple and neutral -- in other words, not over-the-top romantic -- it makes the initial exchange low key.

And if she isn't down to talk? No problem. Your casual approach makes it even easier to casually move on.

Make a positive comment about your surroundings.


You're at a movie, an art gallery, or a concert. You see a woman who catches your eye.

When you're close enough, make an off-hand comment about something you're both observing. Keep it upbeat so that her initial impression of you is positive. In some settings this works better than others -- few people want their ear talked off at a movie -- but it's almost always a good way to break the ice with someone.

If they're receptive to you, expect for them to give you an opportunity to hang out more. So, they may linger once the movie is over. Or you may notice them crossing your path during the show more regularly that coincidence usually dictates. And if it comes with occasional eye contact? Congrats, you're in.

Compliment her.


No, I don't mean you should take the opportunity to tell her that you're sure the stars fell from the heavens to collect in her beautiful eyes. Even if you believe that, keep that mum for a while.

Instead, focus on a unique accessory, garment, or something else she's carrying, like a book. It's something she hand selected, so it's an extension of who she is more than what she looks like. Compliments about that stuff tend to go better in the early stages of dating. They're nice to hear, but they're not too forward, either.

One last thing:

More important than what you say is how you say it. If you approach someone confidently, giving off the impression the conversation is a low-pressure, no-big-deal exchange, the woman will probably take it the same way. It will help lower her guard, making it easier to get to the next stage: securing a date.

Dating Tips for Men: Landing a First Date

For many men, the idea of asking a woman out is nothing short of terrifying. It can make even the bravest men nervous. There is no reason getting a date should be stressful, though. 

Here is how to make it happen.

1.      Remember that women are not from a different planet. Some men approach women like they are from Venus, while men are from Mars. If you want to improve your dating game, toss that divisive mentality aside. When you talk to a woman, you are not talking to the equivalent of an alien. There may be differences between the two of you, as is the case with any person you talk to you, but there are also bound to be a number of similarities. Focus on what you share, not what separates you.

2.      Stop stressing about rejection. Dating is a process. For most people, finding the right person takes hundreds, even thousands, of dates. Incompatibilities arise, life factors force people to take different paths, and feelings change. The sooner you make peace with the fact things might go differently than you originally planned, the better your experience with dating is likely to be.

3.      Get on her radar. Some men are suave and lucky enough to approach a woman out of the blue and get a date out of it, but most women would be pretty stunned by someone so forward. If you are interested in a woman who you see fairly regularly, it is better to get on her radar first. Pay her extra attention, but don't get stuck in a faux-boyfriend role, either. Eventually, check her marital status by asking a question about her husband or boyfriend. She'll get what you're hinting at.

4.      Learn her interests. If you have paid more attention to her than others, fished out her single status, and she still seems warm to you, chances are she is at least somewhat interested. Now it is time to learn about her interests. You will be able to use this information when you ask her out. You have to be careful not to stay in this stage for too long. The longer you act like a platonic friend, the more likely it is that she will only view you that way.

5.      Just do it – ask her out. If the woman you are interested in seems to enjoy your company and is openly available, ask her out. Ask over the phone or, better still, ask her in person. Avoid text messages and e-mail, since most people find them to be impersonal. Keep your question short and simple. Suggest that the two of you do something that you know she would like based on the conversations you held earlier about her interests. Offer a specific time and date. If you leave the question open-ended, you will only have to reinitiate the question sometime in the future.

One of the worst things you can do in the dating game is to anguish over circumstances that are not in your control. With dating, you cannot control another person’s feelings. What you can do, however, is make sure the woman you are attracted to feels comfortable around you and that she is single. If both those things apply, go for it. Ask her out.  

Five Signs a Long Distance Relationship Isn’t Right for You

Long distance relationships get a lot of mixed reviews. Some claim they never work out. Others say that it’s worth enduring miles of separation for someone very special. Most people end up concluding that, at the end of day, it is the people involved who ultimately determine whether it works out or not. Some can handle long distance relationships; others are less suited for them. 

Here are five signs a long distance relationship probably isn’t right for you.

You believe long distance relationships never work out.

It’s absolutely essential that both partners have faith in each other and their bond. If you’re the type of person who believes, deep down, that having a partner who’s far away means your relationship is doomed, you should seriously reconsider ever getting involved in long distance romance. Take a moment to reflect on whether you have faith it’ll work. If you honestly believe it won’t due to distance, that belief will likely be a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

You aren’t a strong verbal communicator.

With many miles in between you and your partner, communication becomes incredibly important. You don’t have the same luxury of nonverbal cues like couples who see each other every day. You’re drawn together by your words more than significant others who often cuddle on a couch in silence while watching TV. 

Without strong communication through phone calls, Skype conversations, e-mails, and online messengers, chances are your relationship will struggle. If verbal communication isn’t one of your strengths, you might want to think twice before getting into a relationship with someone who is far away.

You get jealous easily.

A common concern with having a partner who is far away is that the distance makes it easier for him or her to cheat. For that reason, long distance relationships require a lot of trust. If you feel it’s in your nature to be jealous, being with someone long distance could put you through a lot of emotional turmoil. 

This is especially true if you don’t have the utmost confidence in the person you’re with. Unless you fully trust him or her, there’s a good chance jealousy will eat away at the relationship quickly.  

You are broke.

All the travel that comes with these types of relationships gets expensive, even if you’re only a few cities away. While couples who are close can cut corners if they need to, couples who are far apart usually require more funds to sustain the relationship, even if they’re really frugal about what they decide to do when they’re together. 

This is especially true if airfare needs to enter into the picture. If you know that you both don’t have enough disposable income to visit each other regularly, think about whether you want to enter into the hardship of knowing you can rarely see someone you care about a lot.

You aren’t very busy.

If you find that you often rely on your significant other to make up the bulk of your social life, long distance relationships are probably not for you. Many people who do well with long distance partners manage to keep themselves busy; both people have new events to share with their partner, and they’re also occupied enough not to feel very lonely. 

Of course, they miss their boyfriend or girlfriend, but they’re socially active enough to enjoy their life even though their significant other isn’t always there in person. On the contrary, a person whose life revolves around contact with his or her partner can eventually develop resentment because distance tends to make the partner less accessible.

It’s up to you to decide whether a special person in your life is valuable enough that you will endure distance to be with him or her and put in the work necessary to maintain the relationship. 

However, if it’s in your nature to respond poorly to all the things that come with long distance relationships, you should think carefully before getting into one. Even though you want to be with someone badly, there is a chance it still might not work because you’re not suited to have many miles between you and the one you love.