How to Maintain a Good Relationship with Your Boyfriend

Love is in the air. You couldn't be happier. You've finally snagged a great boyfriend and you want it to last. Although your chemistry may be excellent and your conversations come naturally, your bond could always use some maintenance  Here are some tips on how to maintain a good relationship with your boyfriend.

Don't take him for granted.

At first, all the sweet things seem just that: sweet. You love the way he shows you he cares. But in time, you may fail to appreciate them, or worse, simply grow to expect them. Bad plan! Appreciate caring gestures. All of 'em.

Maintain your own life.

Strong relationships are usually borne out of two people who have busy, unique lives that are wonderfully intertwined. Once you lose your individuality, or try to make your boyfriend lose his, it's only a matter of time until your relationship goes sour. Maintain your own life in order to maintain a good relationship with your boyfriend.

Watch your finances.

Perhaps you can feel the impact less when you're young and new to the dating scene, but money impacts everyone. Happy relationships are usually financially happy relationships. Keep your finances in order, and encourage your boyfriend to do the same. And if money's tight? Stick to inexpensive and/or free dates until everything's sorted out!

Communicate well, and often.

A good relationship is usually formed out of good communication. Don't let this aspect of your partnership slip!

Read more on how to keep your relationship together: The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lastsby Gary Chapman is an insightful book on "love languages," and what it takes to make romance last. (And others agree -- it's rated 4.7 stars on Amazon, with over 1,500+ reviews).

Keeping relationships strong is more of an art than a science. That doesn't mean, however, there are no tips to follow. If you want to maintain a good relationship with your boyfriend, enjoy the time you share while actively taking steps to keep things moving along beautifully.

Why Your Ex Hates You -- The Truth

Your last relationship didn't end well. A few months have gone by since the break-up and you're hoping you can at least be friends with your former love. But there's a huge problem with that plan -- your ex ignores you, or worse, seems to flat-out hate your guts. So, where's this animosity coming from? Here's the ugly truth about why your ex hates you.

Are you an evil ex? That could explain why your ex hates you.

You caused irreparable harm.

Think back to your relationship. How did you treat your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife? If not very well, you may be underestimating how difficult it is to get over really bad treatment, especially when it came from a partner who was supposed to be a source of love and support. In some cases, the damage may be so deep, things won't ever be fully right.

You won't give them space.

You broke up for a reason. Chances are, they need time away from you to process what happened and to make the next step in their life. Give them their time; if you don't, they could grow to hate you for it.

You lied. A lot.

Deception cuts deep, especially when it's perpetuated by those you love. You may be attempting a new lease on life, but let's face it, your past plays a role in shaping how you're perceived. It'll take time for new (positive) habits to be the new norm. And until your honest routines becoming the new normal, residual habits (that were once damaging) could help explain why your ex still hates you, or at the least ignores you.

You embarrassed them in a big way.

It may have felt good after a squabble to embarrass your ex at work, around respected peers, or their parents, especially in a bold, intensely malicious way. But it didn't feel good to them. These kinds of actions quickly snowball into break-up territory, and if this kind of act brought your former relationship to its knees, chances are your ex won't want to be pals for some time.

Painful relationships take time to heal. Until they do, review the old barbs from your previous romantic union for insight into why your ex hates you. And if you want to stop the hate, if you can, you need to work hard at developing new habits that show you've grown.

How to Find a (Good!) Relationship

The question comes up a lot: How do I find a good relationship? Wanting a connection transcends life stages -- whether you're in college, getting your life back after divorce, retired, or established in a career. So, what's the trick to solving this common desire?

Here's how to find a relationship (a good one!) and it requires steps that are probably different than you think.

Stop looking!

I know, you're probably thinking: What?! But it's true! The more you focus on finding a suitable partner, the more it will stress you out, which will trickle over into how you interact with someone you find who you do like. That's not to say you should never approach people -- that's my last tip! -- but finding a relationship shouldn't occupy all your mental energy.

Get rid your checklist

Do you have a list of requirements for a partner that's a mile long? It's time to get rid of it. Or, at the least, do some editing. Having standards is excellent, as is knowing what you want. But sometimes great additions to your life emerge out of unsuspecting places. Be open to people who might initially be missing some of your requirements; you never know, they might offer something you'd hadn't even thought to put on your list.

Think about what you offer

If you've been single for longer than you would have liked and you're feeling down, it can be difficult to project the awesome person you are. Before you get down in the dumps, reflect for a minute: what do you offer? What cool things have you done? What went right in your previous relationship?

Dive into personal interests

You've got hobbies, right? Are you connected with all the organizations in your community related to them? Even if you can only commit so much time per week, having your feelers out in communities whose activities you love not only will contribute to your happiness, but will widen your social net to include like-minded people, which can be an effective solution for how to find a good relationship.

Interested in someone? Ask them out!

OK, this sounds obvious, I know. But please think for a moment: how many times have you had interest in someone, only to wait for the perfect time to make your move (which never came!)? Or believed the other person should approaching you? If you're serious about finding a relationship, you have to drop the excuses. Besides, what's the worry? You're probably asking them out for coffee, not marriage! (I hope.) Worst case scenario, they say they're busy, and then on to the next one.

Countless people wonder how to find a good relationship, the fact of the matter is, one solution doesn't fit all. The best thing you can do is invest time in yourself, stay calm, and if you do encounter someone you like, approach 'em!

How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend to Want You Back

Maybe your boyfriend broke up with you; perhaps you ended the relationship. Now, time has passed and you realize you want your ex back. But you can't just snap your fingers and start things over. You have to get your ex boyfriend to want you back. How can you make that happen?

I won't lie -- getting back together with something can be difficult, sometimes even impossible. But if you can pull it off and your relationship blossoms, it's worth it.

Give him space

Blowing up his phone every few minutes, or burying him in text messages isn't the way to go. Although it may seem strange, sometimes having no contact for a while can give him enough space to decompress.

Reflect on why you broke up

You've given him some space, which can be good for him, but is also good for you. It means you have time to distance yourself from this person and the emotionally-charged world of relationships.

In this neutral state, think back to some of the reasons you broke up. Did you two return to the same conflicts time and time again? Did your ex boyfriend often bring up the same complaints? Were these complaints justified and, if so, are you prepared to fix them?

These are all important issues to reflect on before trying to get back together. If you know which things are broken and why, and if you're prepared to fix them, then you stand a shot. If you want to start up things again without changing any part of your relationship, changes are you'll be exes again in no time.

Develop your friendship again

Successful relationships are often built on strong friendships. An excellent partner is also your best friend. After giving each other some space, ease into communication if your ex is open to it. Cultivate your friendship. Demonstrate to each other that you can be good friends, and in the process reveal all the cool things about each other that sparked the attraction in the first place. If you can't sustain a healthy friendship, your dating life will likely be unhealthy, too.

Stay busy

Don't focus all your energy on restarting your old relationship, though. That could make you come across as desperate, which may lower the chances of rekindling your romance. Stay invigorated and balanced by diving into work, school, clubs, or sports. Active, engaged people usually exude a bright, confident energy that is irresistible.

Be honest

It's been a few weeks, even months, since you broke up. You've given him some space, reflected on what went wrong, and developed independent interests. If you're still interesting in pursuing your romance -- and he seems like he may be open to the idea, too -- it's time to open up about what you want. Let him know how you feel.

Getting your ex boyfriend back can take time and patience. Remember, relationships take time to develop, so don't rush into old dating habits if you want to stand a good chance of keeping your boyfriend around for years to come.